Thursday, March 8, 2012
Letters of insanity I
You’re not the nicest man I’ve ever met, but you’re by far the kindest. A nice man would have stopped me, but as a kind guy you put me at ease and held me. Men always fall into one of two categories: naughty or nice, wrong or right, hot or cold, and scared or bold. You’re naughty, wrong, hot, and bold; I am the exact opposite as it goes for girls.
The dark concealed my fear, but your headlights showed my passion. After we parted I gingerly touched my lips where yours had been moments before. The fear hadn’t set in until I had left, after your car had gone and your voice had disappeared from my mind.
In a way it makes me sad, to know that we’ll never be together but in a way I am glad as well. You scared me, and the truth is I’m terrified. The thought of being alone with you paralyzes me, your touch can bring me to tears and your kiss kills me. I hate the way you can so easily look at me with love and turn around to her and pretend nothing is different.
I could lie in bed and cry for hours over you but I’ll never let you know. You’d be to kind to me; you’d hold me and tell me it’ll be ok, even when I know it won’t. It’ll never be ok as long as we are together. I’ll always lose sleep because of you, I’ll always toss and turn in bed because of you and I’ll always be sad because of you. The truth is, your love will drive me to insanity.
If you ever read this, let me make it clear; I will always forgive you as long as you stay here. You don't have to worry about hurting me, you dont have to fear my fear. All i want is for you to love me, stay with me and hold me. In the morning i'll regret it, but i'll die if your not near.